*Sigh*

I'm freezing today. It's friggin muggy as all heck outside... and I'm FREEZING. That would be idicative by the icicles hanging from the AC vents here at work and the stupidity of me getting a soda at lunch. Between the two I didn't have a chance.

Dooce was especially funny today. If you bother to read the comments there are some great options in there about signs to hang over your doorbell. The woman never ceases to make me crack up. I could only hope to write as well as she does someday.

Flashback lunch is currently playing Oingo Boingo's Stay. Can I just tell you that' s one of my favorite Boingo songs ever? The only one that will consistantly beat it out for me would be We Close Our Eyes, the live version at the farewell show especially (that one brings me to tears). Jeez, I sound emo!

I find it funny that my mother raised me to wear black, pushed me away from dance classes and cheerleading, and then thinks it weird that I'm a semi-goth/punk now. I only say semi because I'm not really into "scenes" or dressing the part. Matthew gets annoyed when I call myself anything like that... because I'm not really, but if you look at my music and the clothes I do buy when money is no object (can you guess how often THAT happens?) then I do fall closer to that side of the spectrum. My favorite "grown-up" movies (not porn... just not kid-friendly) all have dark covers and involve vampires, pirates, star Johnny Depp or are just directed by Tim Burton. I love Metallica, Linkin Park and any other music that just screams at you. I've recently discovered H.I.M. who has been targeted as "goth" (as well as self-dubbed "love metal", emo and a bunch of other categories) and fell in love with them. I loved Hot Topic before it got overrun with retarded little 'tweens and their mommies buying clothes for them and only REALLY stopped shopping there due to lack of funding and their scary sizing ideas (thanks to said retarded 'tweens... a large will now cover only half of my massive boobs). I know they have a "plus" sized store called Torrid. I love Torrid... except I look like the skinny girl in the fat girl store there (I am NOT skinny btw). Where's the "alternative clothing" store for NORMAL sized women... y'know... from size "I eat like a decent healthy person should" to "a little more to love but not too big"? I guess if you like to wear black you're either suffering from an eating disorder or have bad thyroid (let the complaint emails commence!).

But then there's the OTHER me. The Mormon me. The scrapbooker/photographer/crafter/mommy wannabe. I have a softer "domesticated" side that I also love. Granted... I'm playing screamy music on my iPod/Tunes while I do it... but I do the cutesy stuff too. Mom says that it's the pink-loving ballerina dancing 5 year old that I was surfacing. I find it embarrassing to admit that there was a time when I loved to wear pink (although I own several work shirts in that color, it's only because my work thinks too much black is creepy). Maybe I'm just weird, I dunno.

*sigh*

I'm just your average confused Metal(lica)-lovin', head-bangin', motherhood-wishin', scrapbook-makin' Mormon girl.